Dear friend,
Yep! I've been there before, I think i'm still there now.
I am a shy introverted wallflower.
The truth about this statement is that I am the one who gave myself those labels.
Yeah sure, there was a lot of childhood experiences in my past that shaped my life [some good, some bad] but as I got older, do I hear anyone giving me those feedback about myself?
I am my worst enemy hands down!
YES, I am a wallflower, an introvert, a loner... however, to let my own labels of my personality traits define my self-worth seems too cliche.
Not long ago, my husband and I were invited to a wedding. I get a little unsure about some crowds but I was determine to have fun at this wedding. I mean, I didn't want my husband to stress about if I was chatting to someone at the party or if I was feeling comfortable.
A few moments into the party, I could feel the sensation of uncomfortableness getting in the way. I could hear my negative mindset saying; "I am just a waste of space," "I don't belong here," "these people don't like me," "I want to go home," and so on.
But I am so self aware these days that I had to do something to shut this crazy voice inside of me. {Just a disclaimer, I am never perfect, sometimes, crazy negative me WINS}
First of all, who gives a F about if these people like me or not. Can I hear a Hell Yeah? We are so worried about other people.
When you are supposed to be someone who has unlikeable behaviors, you automatically have zero self-belief or think you are not worthy enough to reach your fullest potential.
This is what I believe, and this is a pretty good belief system to have.
- I can be a wallflower and still have fun at a party.
- I can be a loner and still have meaningful friendships because one of our superpower [as introverts] is knowing who in our circle of so call friends are cool and like minded people like us.
- I can still be an introvert and be confident at my job and hold space of authority.
When in doubt, dance.
